


Never Have I Ever

by sparkly_butthole



Series: That Thing From '37 [1]
Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Asgardian Liquor, Clintasha - Freeform, Coming Out, Drinking Games, M/M, Mentions of Prostitution, Mentions of gloryholes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-25
Updated: 2017-08-25
Packaged: 2018-12-19 16:23:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11901549
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sparkly_butthole/pseuds/sparkly_butthole
Summary: The Avengers play 'Never Have I Ever.' Steve shares some secrets.





	Never Have I Ever

**Author's Note:**

> Beta'ed by the lovely [NurseDarry](https://archiveofourown.org/users/NurseDarry/profile) who has to be the coolest person ever.

“Okay, you guys ready for the most fucked-up game of ‘Never Have I Ever’ ever?” asks Nat as she hands out drinks. Sitting in a circle are all the Avengers currently at the training center- which is more than there’s been since Loki’s invasion, with the addition of their newest member. Steve smiles at Bucky, who is sitting thigh-to-thigh on the floor next to him, in front of what Steve believes to be the comfiest couch on the planet, but which Bucky thinks is entirely too soft. The smile he gets in return is full of secret promise. 

Reclining back, Natasha smiles at them knowingly.

“You sure you’re up for this, Steve? They’ll probably reveal some secrets tonight you might not wanna hear.”  _ And learn some of yours, too, _ Bucky’s eyes say.

“Yeah, Buck. Let’s just consider this another… team building exercise, right Tony? Isn’t that what you called it?”

Stark, already started on his first glass of whiskey, nods sagely. 

“Let’s do it then.” Nat sits on the couch at the head of their makeshift ring. “I need a promise of no butthurt, though. We’ve all been through some tough shit. We share, or we leave, it’s that simple. I’m not airing my skeletons without you guys agreeing to the same.”

Bucky stares at Steve again, saying _ end of the line, pal _ , without words. Steve nods minutely, and then, of course, Bucky goes full ham.

“Woo boy, are you guys about to find out some stuff about Steve.”

Tony’s ears perk up, “Well, I look forward to that. Enjoy your Asgardian ale there, Rogers. But for now: Never have I ever turned into a giant green rage monster.”

Bruce shakes his head. “I guess Tony’s starting then?”

“Drink!”

“Yes, Tony, what do you think this concoction aimed at my face is?” Bruce asks as he takes a sip of his vodka-and-cranberry.

“Wait, so that’s it? We just… say something we haven’t ever done, and then everyone who has done it drinks?”

Bucky squeezes Steve’s thigh, with as much subtlety as possible, but shakes his head in mock disappointment at the same time. “Didn’t we tell you the rules already, genius?”

“Well yeah, I just… won’t we be drunk in like fifteen minutes?”

“ _ You  _ will.”

“Whoa!” exclaims Tony with wide eyes. “Damn, I can’t tell if that’s because Steve’s a lightweight or because he’s done some shit.”

Bucky smirks. “Little of column A, little of column B. You’re about to find out, Stark.”

“Anyway,” Bruce interjects from right by Steve on the floor, “as much as I’d like to get you back, Stark, I’ve got one too. Never have I ever been an assassin.”

Natasha, Bucky, and Clint raise a toast to each other from across the room and drink. Natasha’s got some sweet mixed drink or other, something milky with ‘Russian’ in its name, while Bucky- bless the man- takes a sip of Asgardian vodka. He shudders at just the sip, and Steve’s thankful that he chose the ale.

“Good, good. I will enjoy watching you throw up later, brother Barnes,” Thor exclaims, to Steve’s hilarity. “I wis h to go now.”

“No, no. That’s not how turns work. Tony starts, then we go in a circle this way. I’m after Bruce since I’m next in the circle, you see?”

“Oh. I thought the order was based on strength of will. No offense, shield brother.”

Bucky cracks up while Steve just rolls his eyes and replies, “None taken, Thor. Now, if you don’t mind. Never have I ever… had sex on a first date.”

Tony leers. “But you have had sex, then.”

“I’m not a virgin, Tony, believe it or not. Far from it, in fact, I just… am private about those sorts of things.” Steve winks.

“You know all those touchy-feely things that were normal back in the day don’t count as sex just ‘cause they’re weird now, right? I mean, I know you’re old fashioned, but…”

Bucky takes a sip, because he’s definitely a member of this crowd. “Stark… goddammit. Trust me when I say Steve knows the difference between cuddling and fucking.”

Stark’s eyes nearly fall out of his head. “How the hell would you know that about him? Unless…”

“Because, genius, we shared a tiny apartment. And I was not exactly… chaste. Nor was he, as a matter of fact. So get your head out of your ass.”

“A, my head is permanently up my ass, in case you hadn’t noticed, and B, don’t you guys share a room now?”

“Yep. Because Steve is the only thing that stops the nightmares from coming. Is that what you wanted to hear?”

Stark’s silence is met with a chorus of  _ awwws _ , and Steve looks at Bucky gratefully.

“I guess I can’t make fun of what you do to help stave off the nightmares. You guys have been through some shit together. Still. Goodness, Steve. Here I was thinking you had only been kissed once in your entire life and nothing else.”

Bucky laughs again while Steve holds up a finger. “Technically, it would’ve been twice. Natasha and me, remember?”

The smirk Natasha throws the boys is one of triumph, like she’s just figured out a great puzzle. “I think Tony’s upset that his childhood idol isn’t as wholesome as he once believed.”

“Well, we did warn him.”

“Yes, Bucky, we did, didn’t we? Anyway, I didn’t even catch who drank.”

“Like everybody except Bruce, man,” Bucky swats at him playfully. “You are pretty old fashioned… sometimes.”

“Uh huh. Your turn, Buck.”

“Alright. Never have I ever missed a shot by accident.”

“What? That’s not… a thing. Nobody misses on purpose.”

“That so, Stark? Do you think I didn’t recognize Steve enough to pull a shot sideways? I could’ve killed him fifty times over, but I had enough presence of mind not to. No, I’ve never missed by accident.”

To Steve’s surprise, everyone in the group drinks- himself included- with the exception of Bruce… and Clint. He raises his eyebrows.

“Really, Hawkeye?”

“They call me Hawkeye for a reason, Steve.”

“Sure, but… you had to have missed something at some point.”

“It’s just a matter of knowing which shots you can and can’t take.”

Bucky nods. “Damn. That’s some real wisdom right there, Barton.”

Thor’s next, and he looks about ready to pop, practically dancing on his bottom. “Okay! Never have I ever been human!” he booms.

A collective groan fills the room as everybody drinks. If they were keeping score, Thor would outshine all of them.  _ That’s not fair, _ Bucky thinks.

“Never have I ever had a dick.”

“Nat, dude. Cheap shot,” Clint says beside her.

“Nah,” Bucky responds. “Tactically sound. I’m proud of my little widow.”

A couple drinks in and Steve’s already feeling it. He moves up to the couch behind him and leans back into it. Bucky smiles into his own drink and sits next to him; Steve never could hold his own when it came to alcohol… and Steve is gonna be three sheets to the wind by the time this is over. They both know it.

“Never have I ever been anything other than a normal person with perfectly reasonable talents.”

Natasha scoffs. “Reasonable? You’re a freak of nature, Clint.”

“This freak of nature loves you dearly and will sweep you off your feet and kiss you in front of everyone. So you better be nice to me.”

The room is quiet for a second, then everyone laughs, including Natasha. And everyone drinks, because Clint is, after all, a freak of nature.

“Been white.”

“No way, bird dude. You have to say ‘never have I ever’ or it doesn’t count.”

“Ha! You just mad you been white. Now drink.”

Stark glares at him but takes another sip of whiskey. Bucky reckons the real competition is between him, Stark, and Thor- the latter for his constitution, and the former for his rampant alcoholism.

And he himself for… whatever it is that makes him the Winter Soldier.

“Stark’s turn again. And don’t be mean to just one person. Try to make it something you think more than one person’s done.” And there’s Steve, always the one trying to make things fair.

Bucky shakes his head. “Stevie, doll,” he murmurs. “Maybe we’ll have to do a ‘go fish’ round, eh?” He winks at his partner. 

Steve blushes but stays silent. They’re both sure that at least one specific question will be answered tonight. It’s just a matter of what  _ else _ they end up sharing.

“Alright. Just for that, Rogers. Never have I ever had to drink Asgardian alcohol just to get drunk.”

Bucky and Steve shrug and throw each other a toast. Thor winks at them playfully, and this time when Steve blushes, he’s beet red. 

“Okay,” Bruce begins. He’s turned an interesting shade as well. “Never have I ever had sex with a man.”

The room is utterly shocked when Steve raises his glass to drink it. The shade of his skin can only be described as maroon when he does, and he doesn’t meet anyone’s eyes.

“Did you enjoy it?” Stark asks, because Stark always has to push it.

Steve mumbles an answer that sound suspiciously like  _ maybe _ . 

The room is becoming more shocked by the minute, so much so that they almost miss Thor take a drink. He holds up a hand before anyone can say anything.

“We don’t have the same customs on Asgard as you do here in Midgard. There is much less stigma, especially after a well-fought battle. And Fandral can be very convincing.” He leers, and Natasha laughs. 

“I like that image.”

“Hey!”

“What, Clint, a girl is allowed to imagine things. You fantasize about… who-knows-what. Who  _ wants _ to know what.” A shudder runs through her.

Steve clears his throat and continues. “Never have I ever had a love interest born after 1925.”

“... ugh, goddammit.” Stark finishes his glass and walks to the common area to grab another. “I’m just gonna bring these in here.” The bottle of whiskey, two bottles of vodka, an array of Asgardian drinks, and some sweet stuff that makes Steve want to be sick just looking at it are placed on the table next to the ringleader. “Anyone have any other ingredients they wanna add to their drinks, you can get ‘em yourself. Especially you, Nat, with your-  _ ugh _ \- milk.”

Nat just shrugs.

Bucky thinks for a moment. “Alright, gonna throw you all for a curveball here.” Everyone looks at him expectantly. “Never have I ever eaten a donut.”

There’s one cry of “Boring!” from, predictably, Tony Stark, but the rest of the room seems fascinated with this new development.

“... really, Buck? Well shit, we’re doing a donut run toni- tomorrow morning.”

“Good man, Captain Rogers. You will not be able to walk soon,” Thor interjects with another wink. This time, Steve returns it.

“Okay, Stevie, you got it.”

Before Thor can even say a word, Clint butts in. “Thor’s not even human, everyone drink!”

“Hey!” Thor responds, aghast. “I wish to play too! Just for that, I’m going to spike your drink with Asgardian spirit and not tell you when!”

Steve sighs. Some team building exercise.

“Bring it on, big man!”

Natasha punches Clint lightly on the arm. “Please don’t bring it on, ‘big man.’ I’m the one who has to deal with this one.” 

“I am joking, shield sister. But I will play. Never have I ever fired a gun.”

Even Steve has to drink to that, much as he’s loathe to admit it. Not his style, and killing isn’t his preference; he avoids it when he can. 

“Damn,” Bucky says into his drink. “That’s a good one.” 

The only one who doesn’t drink is Bruce. No surprise there.

“Alright,” Nat says, “Never have I ever gone down on a woman.”

All widened eyes in the room swing comically from Natasha to Steve, who might as well just cover himself in rouge at this point.

“What? It’s not that unusual.”

Bruce seems pensive. “Still. I think we all would’ve expected Natasha to drink on that one before you, Cap.”

“Well, like Bucky said, there’s a lot you don’t know about me.”

It’s Clint’s turn. “Never have I ever had sex with someone the same day I killed them.”

Steve and Bucky share a glance before drinking. This time, the room goes silent in shock. They don’t even notice who else drinks. Bucky, of course, isn’t a surprise, but Steve?

Well, that’s unexpected, to undersell it.

Sam shakes his head fondly at Steve, then takes his turn. “Never have I ever had sex for money.”

Natasha likely expects to be the only one to drink, but to the astonishment of everyone in the room, both men out of time take identical swigs.

“Uh… Steve?”

Steve’s complexion is, predictably, the color of a tomato. It’s interesting how many different shades his skin can come up with. “Bucky and I were poor. When he lost his job one year… well, for a couple weeks we did what had to be done.”

“Well, I’ll be damned,” Sam says softly, and Natasha’s eyes are sympathetic. It was what it was, though; Steve and Bucky had both moved on from that experience a long time ago.

“Oh, I got one!” Tony cries excitedly. “Never have I ever been brainwashed!”

Bruce shakes his head and Sam hits his on the hard backing of his chair. “Jesus wept, Tony.”

Clint drinks quietly, but Bucky just laughs it off. “Guys. That’s not a secret. There’s worse skeletons in my closet, believe it or not.”

_ Like what happened back in ’37 _ .

Steve nods his head but doesn’t make eye contact. If they ask… the two of them will tell the story. It might be good to get it out anyway. But he can’t offer it up like that without Bucky one hundred percent behind him, telling the story with him. And Buck’s mouth is closed so far. 

Bruce smiles beatifically and Steve realizes that he actually has a buzz. He was unsure if that was possible, but it clearly is. And that brings up another concern.

“Hey, Bruce. How you hanging in there? All clear on the big green machine?”

“Oh yeah, Steve. I can handle alcohol- in fact, it helps. Relaxant and all.” Bruce gives him a reassuring smile. “Now, if you’ll excuse me here… never have I ever jumped out of a plane without a parachute.”

“Oh-ho, that’s a fuckin’ lie if I ever heard one! Don’t you remember the helicarrier? You jumped onto a plane in midair!”

“Yeah, but that doesn’t count. It wasn’t me, you know?”

“Oh holy semantics, friend.” Tony’s not about to let this go, and it’d be quite hilarious to Bucky if Steve wasn’t surreptitiously attempting to steal a drink next to him.

“Uh, Steve? Somethin’ you wanna tell me?”

“No, Buck, there’s really not.”

Bucky’s eyebrows draw down in a face Steve recognizes as  _ you’re in trouble later, _ but he’s a little too buzzed to care at the moment. Then he realizes Bucky’s drinking too, and makes the same face back at him.

Natasha laughs. “You guys are too much, all of you. I never thought I’d have such a great family.”

Bruce and Tony break off their argument; the room quiets for a few moments as that sinks in. They all smile at each other, until Tony scoffs- because Tony just can’t help himself.

“Alright, alright, enough of this sappy shit. Who’s next?”

“Okay, my turn. Never.” Steve hiccups before he can continue. “As I was saying. Never have I ever. Walked out on a date. Especially because she wouldn’t put out.” He glares at Bucky with one eye slightly larger than the other. It, of course, ruins the effect. 

“Oh yeah, I’ve done that, too. Across the room high five!” Stark says.

“Fuck off,” Bucky volleys back.

“Only on my terms, Soldier dear.”

Steve stares at Tony in horror.  _ No way did he just hit on my fella. _ But no one knows Steve and Bucky are together- no one, that is, except probably Natasha, and that’s just because she knows everything. It’s also possible Stark is baiting them, and he’s not giving up the ghost that easily. So he can’t exactly claim his territory.

“Alright, alright. So many of you have barely had anything to drink!” laments Bucky. “Never have I ever been called a superhero.”

“Well fuck, that’s bleak,” Nat says as she throws back her white Russian. 

“Hey, I was told my last one was boring, so there you go. And I got all of you to drink, so ha-ha, losers.”

“Something something tactical genius? Right.” She smiles fondly.

“Right.”

Thor’s rictus is so large it looks caught between comedy and nightmare; unlike the others, he’s been drinking indiscriminately the entire night. Undoubtedly, drinking games that require anything other than chugging are greatly discouraged on Asgard.

“Never have I ever lied about being able to pick up the Hammer.”

And, well, Steve never saw that coming.

He drinks the rest of his ale and gestures for another. 

“I knew it!” Thor cries. “How is this possible?”

“He’s a better man than you,” Bucky gets out before his higher functioning can get the better of him. Thor, though, takes it in stride.

“Easy, shield-brother. I know the two of you are close. But you do realize this means he should have the power to rule Asgard? That is great power, indeed. Be proud of yourself, Captain Rogers.”

Steve accepts the toast and downs half the new glass of ale in one gulp. Bucky quietly takes it from him, and asks Natasha with his eyes to avoid something Steve’s done.

“Alright. Never have I ever been on either side of a glory hole.” She smirks at Clint expectantly.

Laughs are had at that; then Tony drinks, and it’s even funnier.

And suddenly, Steve is taking back his ale from Bucky and downing the rest of it. The room erupts in a roar.

“... what the fuck, Stevie?!” Bucky says when he has breath back.

“Do you remember back in ‘37, when I got singled out at the bar by that really rich guy?”

“Yeah, he was the last mark you took.”

“Well. He… uh, showed me some things. And then paid me enough money to live for a month, until you got that job at the docks.”

Tony scratches his head with the hand holding the whiskey; he appears confused when some of the stuff ends up in his hair. “Holy hell, Cap. I know I’m a mess, but Jesus Christ on a cracker.”

Natasha just shrugs; she tried.

“Well, mine’s a little boring, but… never have I ever spoken Russian,” Clint says.

The entire room with the exception of Thor takes a drink, and Clint mutters into his own whiskey that he should really take some lessons.

Sam’s the last one to go, and they all silently agree that this is the last round. Everyone has a nice buzz, and Steve… Steve’s pretty far gone. 

_ And to be fair, _ Bucky thinks,  _ he did drink an entire glass of ale in about two minutes. _

“Okay. We’ve gone from violence to sex to donuts tonight… Imma give you guys the best one. Never have I ever… slept with someone in this room.”

Steve looks at Bucky. Bucky looks back at Steve, blinking slowly. Giving permission. Together, they drink, eyes never leaving each other. 

Cautious silence falls, everyone wondering if this is a current or past affair, but they all erupt in applause when the two men put their arms around each other on the couch and kiss.

“It is about damn time!” Sam yells.

“I like that image, too.”

“I always knew you two would get together,” Stark says. 

Bucky corrects him. “Would? Steve and I have been together since 1938, Stark.”

“Wow, the historical inaccuracies in dad’s notes are horrendous. Can I correct the record? Can I, please? Huh? Huh?”

Steve’s beet red from his head to, Bucky knows, his groin. “No, absolutely not. This does not leave this room, is that understood?”

The Avengers nod.

“Oh, and one other thing. Stark, you hit on my fella one more time, I’m gonna have to hurt you.”

“Yeah, yeah. Now, I think, since everyone’s calmed down, we can agree there’s something you guys need to tell us.”

“About our relationship?”

“No, about how you ended up a whore.”

“... Oh.”

“Yeah. And how you killed someone you slept with in the same day,” Sam adds.

And there it is. The Thing From ‘37.

Glancing at Bucky with a shrug, because now he’s drunk enough to finally,  _ finally _ get this off his chest, he begins.


End file.
